Why Women Love


The Desire For Love!

Love Desire

Love Desire (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

LOVE! The most sort after spice of life.

How do we fall in love and why do we so desperately yearn to find love?

Without Love, life is not worth living. Radical as this may sound, countless people make this same statement, every hour, or at least entertain the idea. Strangely, even those who seem to have found love, many still have loads of questions. They are not sure whether they have really found love.

My goodness, we are in such a predicament. How can we launch out on a mission to find something we don’t know? Imagine an army Captain calling on his troops and giving them an assignment: “Laddies and Gentlemen, we are on a mission. There is something good out there. We don’t know exactly what it is yet, but we are going out there to find it, and bring it home with us.” “And, one more thing; find your own map and equipment.”

If there are missions that are impossible in life, this one takes the lead.

Sadly, this is exactly how most of us approach love. We have not understood the “love mission.” We have no clue what we are looking for, where we are looking, what tools to use and how to know when we have finally found it.

What is Love?

Perhaps we can try to use some ancient wisdom. Love is a force beyond nature. You cannot buy it, get it by force or pretense, you cannot seduce it, or trap it. No matter how smart or calculated you play it, you will never win love by dictating terms.

Love is bigger than all of us. Nobody fully comprehends the vastness and power it possesses. The best we can do is to go with the flow. We don’t choose the people who fall in love with us, neither do we choose those we fall in love with. Yes, we can choose the ones we marry (At least in the free societies, where people are not forced to marry those they don’t love, through arranged marriages). In fact, some of the people who love you, you will never know or meet them face to face. Don’t ask me why? I have no idea.

Unfortunately, you cannot stop anyone from loving you. You can’t pay them out of loving you. You cannot legalize or abolish it. Love is not a thing. So you can’t trade it. You can engage in commercial sex trade, but not love trade. It’s not a commodity for exchange. Acts of love maybe, but not love itself.

Love is what makes us human. The need to want and be wanted. The feeling of belonging and acceptance. Everyone of us needs it, and a lack of it, or a diminished sense of it, makes us feel inadequate.

So what should we do with Love?

  1. Let Love be Love. Many people delay and deny themselves love because of holding false notions. Defining traits of the man they want. Must be six-foot tall, muscular body, have a steady job, a stallion, etc. Or she is a redhead, sexy body, must have some curves but not exaggerated, she lives by herself, not have too many boyfriends, etc.
  2. Take Risks. Love is risky. You cannot be too careful and expect to fall in love. There are no guarantees. You have no control of the other person. You can only be in control of your feelings. Yes, you can manipulate people to hang around you and make them enjoy your company, but you cannot know what thoughts and feelings they harbor inside or towards other people.
  3. Give more than you expect in return. Isn’t that what love is? Many of us make the mistake of going into a relationship with predominantly us in mind. Love is about giving and not receiving. Receiving is not up to us. Happy are those that fall in love with the ones that reciprocate.
  4. There is enough love to go around. Do not be selfish with love or be desperate enough to hunt for another person’s love. Yes, some people will be irresistibly attractive and you will love them. But go find your own. Your search is not over yet. Don’t be lazy.
  5. Do not give love a timeline. There many people who feel frustrated because they think they are running out time. Unfortunately, we cannot dictate when to fall in love or how love finds us. This force is beyond our capacity to dictate. The best we can do is to simply go with the flow. You can invite love by being the love you are looking for – making yourself available and treating others in the manner that you expect to be treated. You can’t dictate it, it just happens.

When you finally find love, somehow you know exactly what it feels like. You realize what you have been searching
for, and your heart feels at peace. Hang in there, Love will certainly find you.

Share this with someone you know who is searching for Love.


2 comments on “The Desire For Love!

  1. Diva's in Christ
    March 28, 2012

    Love is the desire to benefit another at the expense of oneself…..Love is the desire to give. Lust is the opposite. You must first learn to love yourself, before you will be able to comprehend how to begin to love another. Be blessed!

  2. kelvinkings
    March 28, 2012

    Diva’s in Christ, I like your insight. True love involves sacrifice of self, except that it brings you joy and fulfillment while you are doing it. So it’s not necessarily at your expense, but for your benefit because you enjoy doing it. You reap what you are sow. The more love you give, the more you receive, even though sometimes it may not come directly from the person you give it to.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s


This entry was posted on March 27, 2012 by in Issues of the Heart and tagged , , , , , , , .


%d bloggers like this: